Short of words or short of creativity?

Television commentary has shrunk to its nadir in the ongoing IPL.

The Set Max team was never known for exceptional cricket commentary. But the presence of Ian Bishop, Robin Jackman, Greg Chappell, Pommie Mbangwa and Tony Cozier in the team was an added bonus.

Now that most of them have left to attend national duties, we have to put up with full-time nonsense from Ramiz Raja, Aamir Sohail, Ravi Shastri, Sunil Gavaskar, Sivramakrishnan and Arun Lal.

Arun Lal and Ramiz Raja give an impression that they read through the Oxford English dictionary everyday before wielding the megaphone. Unfortunately, their dictionary doesn’t provide them with the usage of the word in a sentence and the context of usage. As a result, they ostensibly have no inkling about the usage of those words and frame their own sentences ‘around’ them.

So you hear Ramiz Raja uttering “That was hit vociferously by Afridi”.

He realised his folly soon after (that it meant something else), but never bothered to correct it and went on with it.

Ramiz is someone who can speak for hours and hours on cricket without actually making any sense.

He runs neck and neck with Arun Lal, according to whom, the bowler delivered a well camouflaged slower one. The bowler however didn’t bowl a well disguised one.

Arun Lal comes up with words from his own dictionary at times.

Aamir Sohail tries to sensationalize every word of his.

If Ravi Shastri is a master of cliches, what we have here is a commentary team of cliches.

Every batsman makes a shot look ridiculously easy when they hit a boundary.

Invariably, every cricketer that is miked up is asked about the atmosphere.

And we are sick of their “It is great”, “It is fantastic” kind of replies. For a change, it would be nice of someone to actually explain the composition of the so-called atmosphere. Something like 78% Nitrogen, 21.5% Oxygen, 0.3% Carbon dioxide etc. would be a much appreciated answer for a change.

It is a common observation that most of the cricketers that are miked up haven’t played a single game in the tournament. It makes it all the more funny when they are asked about their approach to the game.

Invariably, every bowler that is miked up is asked the question “T20 is not a bowlers game. How do you mentally prepare yourself for it”?

We have had enough of this nonsense.

In future, if the commentary team wants to mike somebody up, let them be prepared with a different set of questions.

If they try to manufacture questions extempore, they suck.